During dinner one night at the White House, the kitchen caught fire. So Martin Van Buren, president of the United States and, I'm assuming, volunteer Fire Marshall, ran and put it out. When he came back to the table his arch enemy, Henry Clay, asked him what was up. Van Buren answered. Clay then remarked, to the man who had invited him into his home AND saved his life, "I am doing all I can to get you out of this house, but believe me, I do not want to burn you out."
Which proves once and for all that Henry Clay was a colossal dick.
I made you a Martin Van Buren mask. Click here to download the large file, then print it out on 11"x17" paper. If anyone makes this, please send me a picture!!